Okay, this will be my last mention of housework for a while, and of windows in particular. I actually took my own advice, and simply decided to get started. I put on some good music and got to work. Believe it or not, it was just like I said! The moon is in Gemini (I just checked my calendar), the windows were easy to clean, absolutely no smearing, and the time flew by. I got to listen to three whole CD’s (Gung Ho and Land, disc one, from Patti Smith and Stadium Arcadium, Jupiter, RHCP). That was quite pleasant.
I confess, it took me a while to get started, but that was because I had to cook lunch, and anyway, you’re not supposed to clean windows when the sun is shining directly on them. In the morning I was too busy (had a second cup of coffee and sipped very slowly), so I had to wait. In the meantime, I practiced that cute little insanity song I wrote the other day — over and over. I really like it. It has a very catchy tune.
The process of doing the windows and listening to music is very healing. Is it a coincidence that my thoughts are clearer now – like the windows? I doubt it. It’s good now and then to do something different, take care of a task from the bottom of the list. Some days I focus on really stupid things that I consider a waste of time, but it’s nice when they’re done. (You know – like wiping off the stair railing, door knobs and light switches, or the tops of light fixtures.) It’s kind of like clearing things out in the subconscious – nobody notices it, yet there is a different feeling in the air. And your hands don’t stick to the doorknobs! (My daughter had a couple of friends over the other day, and they helped her finally finish off her Easter bunny. All I can say is, teenagers can make just as much of a mess as toddlers!)
During a break I briefly discussed something I’d hesitated to mention with my husband. It didn’t bring quite the results I wanted, but it was one more step towards better communication. That’s good enough for today.
The moral of the story is: Just get started. It’s not as difficult as it seems.
Showing posts with label rituals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rituals. Show all posts
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Windows
Labels:
children,
healing,
housework,
life,
meditation,
recovery,
rituals,
spring cleaning,
work habits
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Spring wake-up efforts
After a workout at the gym today, I felt much better. I need to work out regularly. It helps me stay in shape, keeps me strong and in a better mood, prevents osteoporosis and weight gain. (Since passing 40, I’ve noticed a tendency to gain weight more easily if I don’t get enough exercise.) Sounds like a good deal to me! Okay, I’m motivated! (It’s kind of hard, because I’ve just never been the type that wants to do something all the time, though it does me good. But once I’m there, I enjoy it!) It just occurred to me that this recent slide into darkness coincided with my reduction in activity. I’m sure it’s connected. So if you’re feeling down, when’s the last time you moved that body?
But before I went to the gym, I picked two goddess cards – two because two made themselves noticeable. That does happen on occasion. (The deck is by Doreen Virtue, in case anyone is curious.) Who did I pick? First Sarasvati, then Oonagh beckoned. They were both appropriate. (The descriptions are my rough translation from German.)
Sarasvati is a Hindu goddess of the fine arts. Her message is: “You are a boundless being. If you perceive limits – be they temporal, financial or otherwise – that is only your perception, because you are focussed on the material world. You can remove these boundaries by changing your focus. Music is of major importance for the expression of non-materialistic ideals and energy. It helps us move beyond the limits of thinking and existence. Surround yourself with music and let it stimulate new ideas and awaken your creativity. Flow with the music and allow yourself to experiment. Enjoy your boundlessness.” Her advice is to sing, dance, be creative, and/or make music.
Oonagh is a Celtic goddess of lightness/ease. Her message is: “To really be involved in a relationship/project is a long-term commitment, which one should not enter upon lightly. It is so important to me what happens to my planet and loved ones that I will stick by them no matter what. That is not always easy, but it is the only way I can be sure that everything will be resolved and heal. I listen to my heart. I show my loved ones how much they mean to me. I do something to keep matters moving. Don’t worry about other people’s opinions – you profit by pursuing your main goals. You will feel good when you create time and space for matters of the heart. Do what you need to do, and do it with your whole heart. And remember, there is no competition for the true purpose in life, so you don’t have to worry, hurry, or put pressure on yourself.” She says everything will happen in good time. Nor should I take any drastic measures. One step at a time, consistently moving forward, is the best way to go. Ease gently into your new life, don’t be in a rush.
I bet both cards are appropriate for others besides me today, and stumbling upon them here and now is very close to picking them. That’s why I’m sharing them.
I’m following Sarasvati’s advice and surrounding myself in music. One magical song I've been listening to is "Hide in your shell" by Supertramp. Youtube-it! I was 15 when it came out. It was one of the few times I felt understood. I don’t think it needs more comment.
But before I went to the gym, I picked two goddess cards – two because two made themselves noticeable. That does happen on occasion. (The deck is by Doreen Virtue, in case anyone is curious.) Who did I pick? First Sarasvati, then Oonagh beckoned. They were both appropriate. (The descriptions are my rough translation from German.)
Sarasvati is a Hindu goddess of the fine arts. Her message is: “You are a boundless being. If you perceive limits – be they temporal, financial or otherwise – that is only your perception, because you are focussed on the material world. You can remove these boundaries by changing your focus. Music is of major importance for the expression of non-materialistic ideals and energy. It helps us move beyond the limits of thinking and existence. Surround yourself with music and let it stimulate new ideas and awaken your creativity. Flow with the music and allow yourself to experiment. Enjoy your boundlessness.” Her advice is to sing, dance, be creative, and/or make music.
Oonagh is a Celtic goddess of lightness/ease. Her message is: “To really be involved in a relationship/project is a long-term commitment, which one should not enter upon lightly. It is so important to me what happens to my planet and loved ones that I will stick by them no matter what. That is not always easy, but it is the only way I can be sure that everything will be resolved and heal. I listen to my heart. I show my loved ones how much they mean to me. I do something to keep matters moving. Don’t worry about other people’s opinions – you profit by pursuing your main goals. You will feel good when you create time and space for matters of the heart. Do what you need to do, and do it with your whole heart. And remember, there is no competition for the true purpose in life, so you don’t have to worry, hurry, or put pressure on yourself.” She says everything will happen in good time. Nor should I take any drastic measures. One step at a time, consistently moving forward, is the best way to go. Ease gently into your new life, don’t be in a rush.
I bet both cards are appropriate for others besides me today, and stumbling upon them here and now is very close to picking them. That’s why I’m sharing them.
I’m following Sarasvati’s advice and surrounding myself in music. One magical song I've been listening to is "Hide in your shell" by Supertramp. Youtube-it! I was 15 when it came out. It was one of the few times I felt understood. I don’t think it needs more comment.
Labels:
challenges,
change,
coping,
expectations,
goddess cards,
life,
life after bulimia,
music,
physical fitness,
rituals,
work habits
Friday, May 30, 2008
Cleaning out the Closet
I thought since I’m about halfway there, I had things figured out. Today it seems that I’ve got things about halfway figured out, and nothing is definite. Spring is here. That is a time for clearing out the old, letting go of what we don’t need, making space for the new, getting organized and cleaning up.
My oldest item which takes up the most space is: fear. Fear has been the constant in my life, never failing to accompany me and often helping me make a cautious decision, which I later regret. Letting go of the fear means I don’t have to figure everything out now. Since it is not necessary to know the end result, I can jump in anywhere.
Puttering is one of my favorite words. I love to start just by clearing the papers on my desk. Next thing I know, hours have passed and I’ve landed somewhere else in the house, leaving a trail of order behind me. Recently I was lost in speechlessness. Weeks were spent searching for an opening line, to no avail. Then a situation simply occurred and made discussion a necessity, which turned into an intense four-hour puttering in the relationship.
I tend to let housework collect and then do a marathon cleaning. The older I get, the more sense it makes to simply keep at it. I just don’t have the energy to clean the whole house in one day. Maintaining a relationship is kind of like keeping house. After this last discussion, I was exhausted, and decided I would rather keep at it regularly than let things collect.
My fears have long filled the closet and I can’t close the door anymore. Thus I am compelled to sort them through and get rid of them – one at a time, or by the handful. This can also be dealt with in the puttering mode. Once in the habit of letting go, it feels natural to go with the flow, to take risks, to talk, to face fears, to challenge, and to declare needs.
My first fears grew out of my lack of control. As a child, I was helpless. Now I am a grown woman. I do not control my environment any more now than I did then, but I am powerful and have well-developed coping mechanisms. I can deal effectively with outside influences, and I can be a source of influence.
At 5 am in the morning the Friday before Easter, I met 13 women in a parking lot. Together we walked uphill to a sacred spot at the base of a mountain. We celebrated Good Friday, the Spring Equinox, the full moon and the beginning of Spring. A fire was made, and each woman had the opportunity to put her burdens into the flames, that they be transformed. Some had written their wishes on a piece of paper to be burned. Others simply spoke the words and burned them symbolically, along with various herbs for clarity, cleansing and strength.
After expressing gratitude for the opportunity, I offered my fear to the fire, and asked it to transform that fear into courage and love. Night turned into day, the sky brightened, and it began to snow lightly. When we were finished, we walked back down to the parking lot, through the softly fluttering snowflakes, drove through the misty morning to the home of one of the women. There we had a hearty breakfast, with good talk and lots of laughter, to give us strength for the ongoing journey. After all, I’m only halfway there!
My oldest item which takes up the most space is: fear. Fear has been the constant in my life, never failing to accompany me and often helping me make a cautious decision, which I later regret. Letting go of the fear means I don’t have to figure everything out now. Since it is not necessary to know the end result, I can jump in anywhere.
Puttering is one of my favorite words. I love to start just by clearing the papers on my desk. Next thing I know, hours have passed and I’ve landed somewhere else in the house, leaving a trail of order behind me. Recently I was lost in speechlessness. Weeks were spent searching for an opening line, to no avail. Then a situation simply occurred and made discussion a necessity, which turned into an intense four-hour puttering in the relationship.
I tend to let housework collect and then do a marathon cleaning. The older I get, the more sense it makes to simply keep at it. I just don’t have the energy to clean the whole house in one day. Maintaining a relationship is kind of like keeping house. After this last discussion, I was exhausted, and decided I would rather keep at it regularly than let things collect.
My fears have long filled the closet and I can’t close the door anymore. Thus I am compelled to sort them through and get rid of them – one at a time, or by the handful. This can also be dealt with in the puttering mode. Once in the habit of letting go, it feels natural to go with the flow, to take risks, to talk, to face fears, to challenge, and to declare needs.
My first fears grew out of my lack of control. As a child, I was helpless. Now I am a grown woman. I do not control my environment any more now than I did then, but I am powerful and have well-developed coping mechanisms. I can deal effectively with outside influences, and I can be a source of influence.
At 5 am in the morning the Friday before Easter, I met 13 women in a parking lot. Together we walked uphill to a sacred spot at the base of a mountain. We celebrated Good Friday, the Spring Equinox, the full moon and the beginning of Spring. A fire was made, and each woman had the opportunity to put her burdens into the flames, that they be transformed. Some had written their wishes on a piece of paper to be burned. Others simply spoke the words and burned them symbolically, along with various herbs for clarity, cleansing and strength.
After expressing gratitude for the opportunity, I offered my fear to the fire, and asked it to transform that fear into courage and love. Night turned into day, the sky brightened, and it began to snow lightly. When we were finished, we walked back down to the parking lot, through the softly fluttering snowflakes, drove through the misty morning to the home of one of the women. There we had a hearty breakfast, with good talk and lots of laughter, to give us strength for the ongoing journey. After all, I’m only halfway there!
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